What Happens in Class, Doesn’t Stay in Class III

  • Some kid shouted, “Wait me!” after his friends, which made me smile, like when someone tried to say “eggs” but pronounced it as “oggs.”
  • One boy said, “What does ‘historic’ mean?” and then answered his own question by going, “Ah, historique!”
  • A girl walked up to me and said, “Excuse me, my friend wants to know if your scarf is Ravenclaw?” After I said “Yes, it is,” she and her friend giggled delightedly and walked away.
  • One of Al’s classes basically started crying when I left. I’m sorry, children. If only all the students were as excited about having me in the class as you all.
    • Al and I scarred another of her classes for life when we Googled a picture of spray can cheese. (She also showed me a teaching site that she uses, bless her heart.)
  • When a boy asked K in French whether he was allowed to ask for my phone number, she looked at me with pure pain in her eyes and whispered, “I’m sorry, this isn’t my fault.”
    • A girl asked, “Where do you want to live in the future?” and I replied, “In an apartment with my friends”—and then I almost died with laughter when an utterly shocked K said, “The normal response would be, ‘With a husband and children.’” Pfft, I don’t have time for heteronormativity.
  • After a boy asked if I watched basketball and I replied “No,” he sat back in his chair and muttered, “How do you live in the United States?”
  • I told a class that I’m from Richmond, Virginia, and re Virginie, someone said, “C’est une très belle prénom!” (That’s a pretty first name!”)
  • “You’ve wasted your life,” declared a boy after I told him that I’ve only played the Wii because I don’t own a PlayStation or Xbox.
  • A couple of kids whispered, “She can understand what we’re saying?” after I confirmed that I speak French. Yes, children, I can understand all your whispered conversations.
  • One class was supposed to present themselves to me, and one kid ended with, “I am hungry.”
  • Ml said, “Look what happened to America, the greatest democracy in the world!” when talking about the bigoted Cheeto, and I all but snorted with laughter, causing a few girls sitting in front of me to start giggling.
  • During Two Truths and a Lie, one of a student’s truths was, “I am very shy.” I immediately wanted to walk over there and give her a hug, but that probably doesn’t fit teaching assistant protocol.
  • While taking attendance, I called out, “Anaïs,” and apparently pronounced the name so correctly that one of her friends muttered, “She speaks French?”
  • F told me that a kid raised their hand and said in French, “I want to talk about Harry Potter, but I don’t know how to say Harry Potter in English.” You dear, sweet children.
  • A girl told me, “It is very hahaha” because she didn’t know how to say “funny.”

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